There are no bad owners, only bad dogs

2005-11-16

A Cosmo Quiz

Ways to tell that you're a dork:

1) When you watch an "expose" about decaffeinated coffee being full of caffeine, you critique the sampling plan because it doesn't collect a representative sample of both caffeinated and decaffeinated coffee over a sufficiently long period of time.

2) When you go to Saturday night karaoke at Mr. Taco with a bunch of kids, they stare at you like you're damn near twice their age, then realize that they should be looking at you that way.

3) At said event, you suggest that one of the children might get up and belt out "Bat Out of Hell," then try to explain that it is a Meatloaf classic, and all you get is a blank stare.

4) You're suckered into standing in for your boss who has signed up to be an e-pen pal with a local youngster but can't be available for the big field trip out to EduMart; you meet this child, take her around to show her where we make the magic; you end up showing her pictures of your pets on your computer because there's no way to make your job sound acceptable to a fifth grader. You feel bad for yourself and for the fifth grader.

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