There are no bad owners, only bad dogs


...which leads to uncontrollable twitching...

Now I understand why we (as a nation) felt compelled to leave our Anglo Saxon homes and venture across the sea to this land of ours. It was because we just needed to think for half a frickin second instead of hearing people talk talk talk constantly.

Jeezy Chreezy. I have been in meetings that were long and boring and pointless before. Often. I have nodded off in meetings, doodled the doodling equivalent of the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, passed notes to others who were suffering. Yesterday I was tempted to scoop my own eyes from their sockets with a spork just to stop these people from droning on and on and on an....

Ask a simple question is the US, and 7 times out of 10 you get a simple answer. It's a yes/no question, you expect the response to be somewhere in the ballpark of oooh, let's say, maybe, yes or no. You ask a how many question, and you expect a response that might include a number.

Here, you ask something like 'What age do children start year 5' or something like that, and you get this complex history of the English common law system and it's effects on schools and ground squirrels. Christ on a cracker. A meeting that should have gone like this:

'Here's an intimidatingly large pile of crap for you to read.'

'Thank you. I'll get right on that.'

instead went like this:

'...and in this notebook, you'll find that on page 27, there is an index that shows where Cromwell's head is buried...that was followed by the formation of 47 more quasi-governmental agencies...and then this notebook contains naked pictures of Tony Blair...and after that the color-coded section refers you to sub-sections 9.1.1.a through 11.4.2.q....'

General announcement: I know how to fucking read. I do not need to sit in a meeting for 2 and one half hourssss while people read crap from notebooks to me.

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