There are no bad owners, only bad dogs

2005-02-24

Or maybe she has cramps

Tonight on a very special Blossom….

Dos Perros Males: The dog that makes produce look smart ate half of a packet of McVitie’s Milk Chocolate Digestive Biscuits. Something tells me that they are going to have domination and tyranny over Katy’s digestive tract (or, as many people like to say, digestive track. Because small brown vehicles race through it, I suppose.) for the foreseeable future. She seems to also have eaten a bar of soap. That should help. It should help move the avocado skin that she ate through her bowels in a timely fashion. If the cat food didn’t already do the job. This may explain why that dog craps anywhere between 3 and 5 separate times on a half-hour walk.*

I have some useful real-life advice: If you are a nose-picker but don’t want to be, break your own nose. It will break you of the habit of putting your hands anywhere near your nose, making it virtually impossible to dig for boogers. I am, I would like to aver, not in the category of nose-pickers, but I am one of those people who occasionally touches my own face (i.e., I am like everyone else). I am reminded every single time I put a hand near my proboscis why it is better to avoid breaking your own nose – it hurts like a summbitch, still, after two weeks. It’s like Randy says, you gotta leave it all on the stage. I guess I didn’t.

The greggers was all excited because there was a new MythBusters on tonight. However, it is quite clear that all of the actual myths have been busted. We already have seen it proven that sometimes people DO believe Cassandra when she tells the truth, that thunder usually isn’t caused by a huge Viking hammer, and that Poseidon is afraid to swim. MythBusters should now be called “CommonlyHeldMisconceptionsBusters.”

*Later that evening, Katy ate open a package of Ibuprofen, although she appears to have eaten very little to none of it. I guess all that junk food gave her a headache.

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