I saw “I Heart Huckabees” on Saturday – loved it. Love that Marky Mark. He’s a bit of a cutey pie. As my grandmother said about Robert Redford, “I wouldn’t kick him out of bed for eating crackers.” But, I digest. The theater is the unusual thing. Precisely 62 seats. Six rows of 10 seats, except for the back row, which had an extra two seats. Tiny. My grandmother also had all of Herb Alpert’s albums, and I used to stare at the cover of “A Taste of Honey” and try to figure out why the pretty lady was covered with whipped cream and why I felt vaguely naughty when I looked at it. My grandmother also smoked Camels and drank a lot of Manhattans. She sewed fabulous clothes for Barbies -- I had a purple evening gown with a big net skirt for Barbie.
You know how I was whining about people just dropping out of one’s life with no overture, just thwap they’re gone? I realized after I’d written that that sometimes I’m that person who disappears. Not good. Perhaps even bad.
So how are you supposed to react when someone who used to mean a lot to you pops back up via an intermediary just to say “Fuck you” one last time? Damned if I know. Wish him luck? Wish him death? Wish you had a chance to make all of your choices over again?
Anyway, I have many resolutions for the new year. None of them will come true, but I still need to make them. This year I will get my finances in order. I will overcome the heinous financial consequences of getting divorced and being willing to be screwed over just to be rid of the arsehole and I will finally get out of debt. Ha. I will become an organized person. Not worth discussing. I will take my aging house, crumbling at the edges, full of rats, and bring it up to Heights standards. Not bloody likely. I will finally rip the paneling out of the back house and hang some drywall. And install a floor. This will allow the space to be used to house pets and teenagers. I will have all of my priorities exactly balanced so that no one ever takes more than its fair share. I will understand that work is just work. I will get all A’s and I will get a bonus and a raise and my house will always be clean. My dogs won’t have fleas. They won’t eat furniture anymore. I will purchase a new couch and I will not have to pull bits of it out of Katy’s ass.
Am I ranting? I didn’t realize…